Hello everyone and happy holidays! It has come to my attention that 2022 is next week. Which blows my mind at how fast this year came and gone. I say this every year, but every year things just progress faster and faster. I have gone through a lot this year. With the loss of a grandparent to the rapid decline of my mental health. There have been many life lessons I have learned throughout 2021. And if I were to share all of them this blog post would become a novel. I’m actually sharing 21 of them on my Tik Tok ,so after reading this post go head over there and give it a watch. My handle is @tumi_adeyoju. But, back to the point.
Instead of going on for a long page on everything I learned. Here are 5 helpful life lessons that I learned in 2021.
This is a life lesson that I’ve been learning since I got in college. But I didn’t fully realize it till this year. People come and go. That’s just how life is. Not everyone you meet will stay or be there for the time that you think they will. When I had friends ghost me or just leave. I’d try and make them stay. Even if they hurt my feelings at the end of the day. Or if they were actually becoming sucky people. I’d still try to prove that I’m worth staying for. That I’m a good friend. Wasn’t till this year that I saw how I should just let people leave when they wanna leave. If they think you aren’t worth it , then let them think that. There is no need to prove it. So, let temporary people be temporary.
They’re showing their true colors. Their actions are louder than their words ,so believe them when they show it.
2. Your mental health is a priority
2020 was the bottom of my mental health. It was a rapid decline one December 2020-January 2021 came along. So, in about February 2021 , I made the decision to start therapy. And it has shown me how much I put my mental health on the back burner for so long. I knew that my anxiety & depression was controlling my life. But I didn’t think it was as much as it was.
Your mental health is important. I know that with the pandemic, it took a toll to everyone’s mental capacity. And I noticed that people are starting to realize how important it is to take care of your psyche. How much of a toll it can take on your everyday life. No one is watching out for you as much as you are. If 2021 has taught us anything , it’s that humans are selfish. And that means you gotta be too. If that means cutting out toxic people, dumping that boyfriend, ending that job, etc. Then do it. An important life lesson to hold on to.
Because you can’t go on in life hanging on to a thread. Put yourself first. Make yourself a priority.
If I had to describe 2021 in one word, it’d be: healing. This life lesson is something that has been a work up. Hey, I’m still working on it, so I’m not all done. But from the progress I’ve made this year, the person I was in the beginning of the year is not the same as the me now. And that is something I’m truly proud about. Because I found that I was holding on to so much from the past. Clutching on to it tightly as if it was gonna slip from me. It became the thing that gave me drive. As if I had to prove something.
You’re probably holding on to something right now. Maybe a grudge on someone that hurt you. Or on to an event that caused a crack. For a minute, just a minute, sit and think. Is it worth holding on to? What do you gain from clutching on to it so tight? I’ve found that certain choices we made and did in life have a lesson. A life lesson to learn. Something that we need to heal from. And once we’ve done the healing and the growing, we’re supposed to let it go. So, do just that. I’m not saying right this instant. But when you’re ready to stop dragging around that weight. Take the steps to heal, grow, and then let it go.
It’s a saying my dad says. He has been saying it for years at this point. And I never really fully comprehended it till this year. Especially with this blog. There were many days where I’d be crying to him. Because I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted. Or something happened the way I didn’t want it to go. And he’ll tell me this with a smirk on his face cause he knows, that I know, that he’s going to say this.
There’s a silver lining in everything.
A life lesson that translates to: even in the worst things, there’s something good to come out of it. A very optimistic saying, right? But he’s never wrong with it. That’s what I learned this year. Optimism. How to be optimistic in a world that is so pessimistic. Trying to find the good out of things that are negative. We’re always so blinded by the negative that we miss what the positives are. A friend ghosted you? Well…maybe the universe is trying to tell you to start putting yourself first. To make time for yourself. You didn’t get that promotion you wanted? Maybe this isn’t the best time for you to have that much stress. Move the energy to something else.
He’s probably laughing at me as he reads this. It makes him happy when I tell him that he’s right. Cause 99.9999% of the time…he is.
5. Don't feel guilty for putting yourself first
If there is any life lesson to take away from this blog post. It’s this one. In 2020, I put everyone else first. I was on the back burner. And that energy that I had in 2020 just depleted in to 2021. I was burnt out. This was the sign that something has to change. And I did change it.
Often times, we people please. But then we get to ourselves and there’s nothing left. Then when we put ourselves first , we feel guilty. As if we are being selfish. You’re not being selfish. You are putting yourself first. Where is the positive of putting your own emotions and health on the back seat. Letting every take your energy. Newsflash! Not everyone deserves your energy. Preserve it! Choose who ,when, & why other people get access to you. Live your life. Do the things that make you happy. Buy the things that make you smile. And don’t feel guilty for doing it. Because you deserved it.
With all you went through this year, you deserve a break. If no one has told it to you this year, I’m proud of you. For sticking it out and being strong when it was so easy to crumble. And you deserve to put yourself in the driver seat again. Because what we’re not gonna do is go in to 2022 with 2021 attitudes.
THANK YOU FOR READING !
2021 was a challenging year. Mentally, physically, emotionally…it just really tested all of us. Many tears were shed this year. Some in happiness & some in saddness. But in the end, I will say this. I accomplished so much. More than I imagined. Actually, more than I planned on doing. I created a blog, conquered my fear of talking infront of a camera, discovered a new passion of mine, healed, grew as a person, and started to pick up the peices that people in the past shattered. If anything…I call this a pretty good year. So, here’s 2022.
And to you the reader. Thank you for being here. Whether you’re new or an avid reader. Thank you for joining me on this journey. can’t wait to continue on into the new year!
Don’t forget to share and check out my other posts. If you wanna talk more about this week’s post or any other post, shoot me a DM on Instagram! Follow me on all my socials to know when I post a new blog. Also, follow my Facebook page! If you didn’t know I have a shop! Head over there and check out the essential oils, perfumes, and other goodies. Don’t forget to share and leave a comment down below! Welp, until next time!
Follow me on Instagram TikTok Twitter Facebook for more content!
Check out my recent posts!
Healing: 5 Powerful Ways How I Heal As A Black Woman
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, AND HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH! Welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning
Journaling for Growth: Unlock Your Creativity and Clarity
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, and welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday new blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning one, I am
Rejection is Redirection: 5 Helpful Ways to Handle Rejection
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, and welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday new blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning one, I am