In my last post, I talked about how to be the best ally to the LGBTQ+ community. It was a great way to kick off pride month. Over the year, in to thinking about my stories for pride month. I wanted to do something that wouldn’t be meaningless in a way. Anyone can go on Google and just recite facts. Research the important stuff and replay it for others to read. I wanted to do something special and unique for my first pride month as a blogger. So, I asked a couple of my LGBTQ+ friends if I can interview them. They were so willing to say yes.
For this week’s post, I interviewed three of my friends who were willing to talk about their own personal experiences. I gave them the same set of questions . They answered whichever question they felt most comfortable to answer. Gave their own personal stories and opinions on the LGBTQ+ community. How they interact with the community, their own journey’s with their sexualities, and how they view pride month. For their safety and their comfortability some of them will remain anonymous. So, there will be fake names given instead. I’m so appreciative of having them step out of their bubble and do this. I know it took them a lot to share their personal lives like this.
Here’s to a Happy Pride Month to all!
Maria, 19, she/her
*fake name for her own comfortability and safety*
Q: What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
I’m bisexual, questioning being demisexual.
Q: How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
Coming to terms with my sexuality, and coming out to my family and friends were two separate journeys each filled with their own self-discoveries. To say it was difficult would be an understatement, but I’m grateful for every step of the way which includes the obstacles I faced because it gave me the opportunity to be proud of who I am today. I never thought I would get to a place where I’m genuinely comfortable with who I am, and I mainly owe it to the people who made me feel safe while questioning my sexuality.
Q:How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?
After I came out to my loved ones, I was taken aback by how much confidence I felt speaking about my sexuality out loud, especially since I was questioning and doubting myself for a long time. In that moment, whether I got positive or negative reactions, I knew that my coming out wasn’t meant for other people anyway; it was meant for me to take that step of accepting and loving that side of myself proudly.
Q:What are your favorite parts of the being in or just the LGBTQ+ community?
I think especially for the people who don’t have the support of their families, friends or both, having an entire community to lean on is very comforting. Also, being apart of the LGBTQ+ community, it’s nice to be reminded that I’m not alone and that there are others going through the same journey I’m going through.
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
To people who are in the closet, don’t let anyone pressure you to come out. Your first priority should be your safety, & if it isn’t 100% safe for you to come out to your loved ones, then you certainly aren’t required to nor should you force yourself to just because others are doing it. Whether you’re out or not, your identity is valid!
To people who are questioning, the journey of discovering your sexuality shouldn’t be a race or a competition, so don’t let anyone rush you through it. Enjoy it and take the time to get to know yourself. Everyone should have as much time as they need to come to terms with their identities & sexualities.
Q:What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
To me, Pride shouldn’t be contained to one month. However, it is a time for the LGBTQ+ community to come together to celebrate it’s history and achievements. Furthermore, it is a time to be proud of our identities and sexualities. I also feel like the month comes as a reminder to educate ourselves, donate (if possible) and reapply ourselves to continue the journey of fighting for our rights, visibility and social/self-acceptance until we can fully have equality and justice for everyone.
Amber, 19, she/her
*fake name for her own comfortability and safety*
Q: What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
Pansexual
Q: How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
I’ve just always thought people were pretty, and who made me feel happy/comfortable. My mom and cousin both have dated different genders around me and they have such a big impact on me so I didn’t see an issue. Now when it comes to dating women its quite rocky. Before I just thought they were pretty and I’d wanna be around them but I couldn’t see myself be “touchy” or “romantic” with them.
Then it’s shifted from I could only be asexual in a relationship or could never date, but be romantic with them. Now it’s to the point where I’m more comfortable dating a girl in a non-asexual manner. It still scares me a little on the sexual aspect, but it’s just what it is at this point. The way I came to the label of pansexual is because it was more inclusive, as I can simply find love/attraction in anyone.
Q: How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?
I mean I don’t think I really ever just came out, my mom is lesbian and she suspected I kinda liked girls. If people asked I told them but I never felt the need to “come out”. Although my dad and some of my family members don’t know. I don’t see myself doing so until I get into a serious relationship with a girl but some of them are quite religious but I believe they’ll be somewhat accepting but not 100% agree, only because I have other gay relatives and I’ve noticed the reactions.
Q: If you haven’t come out ,does it affect how you see yourself & your sexuality? If so, then how
I just see it as I don’t owe anybody, anything. It’s my life and my body I should be able to do as I please. If someone truly loves you the way they say they do then they should accept me for who I am.
Q: What are your favorite parts of the being in or just the LGBTQ+ community?
Everyone just seems so loving, nice, and supportive. The community is a family, that you can always found somebody to fall back on when you’re broken down.
Q: As a POC in this community, do you see yourself as represented? Whether in the media, in the community, etc.
As a black women, it’s truly hit or miss. Yes we can be in the media, but majority of the time it’s not in a positive manner. If it is positive, it’s normally the same few women circled throughout.
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
Don’t live your life hating yourself and unhappy. All that matters is your own happiness, because you’ll be successful and prosper in your own way that you’ll look back on and the future being proud of. For every person that may not like your decision or love you anymore, there’s another person who will in a better way then that person could before. If someone can’t love you for who you are then that person doesn’t deserve you, anyone is replaceable if they’re bringing you pain.
Q: What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
Being comfortable in your own skin where you’re surrounded by love.
Trey, 20, he/him
Q:What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
Bisexual
Q:How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
A bit of a longer process, I would say sometime in high school I mainly kinda just ignored the signs for a while, and then in college (still am), I took time to focus more on myself than how I felt about how other people viewed me as, which is when I also became more comfortable being myself.
Q:How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?
Once I started being open about my sexuality, it was a little hard at first but I became more comfortable being myself. I realized that this does not change who you are as a person, nor does it take away, it’s just character development. It was around this time that I realized that my thoughts and feelings are just as valid as everyone else.
Q:What are your favorite parts of the being in or just the LGBTQ+ community?
I like how loving and supportive everyone is. It allows you to know that you are not alone in this process.
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
Try to take everyone else out of the picture and just focus on yourself. Think about your feelings and thoughts without the impact of how other people view you. Focus on your own thoughts and how you feel about things rather than other people input or impact they have on yourself.
Q:What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
I feel like pride month is a recognition to show how much we have impacted society. It also helps me to remember that I should not be ashamed to be who I am. To represent how far along we have come with the terms of living the life we choose to live being who we are and why it is not and shouldn’t be a concern. It helps show that there’s no need to be afraid of who you are simply because other people try to force their beliefs and thoughts down your throat.
Gabriella,19, they/them
Q:What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
Bisexual
Q:How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
Complicated. I used to be in denial for a very long period of my life and then I went through every label I could find on the internet until I discovered which one made me the most comfortable. How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?Free. I can express myself more, happier. Meet other people from the community, and I don’t have to hide a part of myself anymore.
Q:What are your favorite parts of the being in or just the LGBTQ+ community?
How open minded most people are… growing up in a very religious community, acceptance of others who are different isn’t very common. Within the LGBTQ+ community you can be whoever you feel comfortable with as a person, and love who you really want to love without being judged.
Q:As a POC in this community, do you see yourself as represented?
Whether in the media, in the community, etc. Also anything else you have to say about being a POC in the community.I do see myself represented in the community. I’ve met plenty of other LGBTQ+ latino people, online and in real life. However, there’s definitely a lack of LGBTQ+ Latino representation in the media.
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
Never rush into putting a label on yourself or trying to fit into a category. Give yourself time to know you and once you find it, be proud of who you are.
Q:What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
Celebration. Celebrating that despite the hardships, the inner conflicts and the struggle to finally accept who I am, I am valid, I can love whoever I want (consenting adult, of course) and that there was never nothing wrong with me. And I got a big community that supports me, and thinks the same.
Ky, 19, they/them
Q:What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
bisexual, slightly questioning pansexuality
Q:How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
I always knew i liked girls so id say it was relatively smooth. lately its been a little confusing since im learning more ab other sexualities.
Q:How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?
I never really officially came out, I feel like everyone just knew? and I was always open about liking girls.
Q:As a POC in this community, do you see yourself as represented? Whether in the media, in the community, etc.
Not really to be honest. Its just like with POC in any community, we aren’t seen often.
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
We were all there. It’ll eventually make sense. You will eventually be confident in how u feel.
Q:What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
Same with BLM, just representing our community. being in both communities is such a bittersweet thing. I luv being apart of them bc we are all so beautiful, but we also deal w things no one else has to
Zema, 23, she/her & they/them
Q:What sexuality do you identify with? or questioning with?
pansexual
Q:How would you describe your journey with your sexuality?
I knew I loved girls as young as 4-5 years old. As I grew older I also learned to love boys as well. I’ve mainly been in relationships and slept with men, but I do love women just as much How do you see yourself after coming out (if you have)?I felt free. Hiding who I was made it hard for me to live authentically. I never officially came out though, just knew who I was and lived it. I answered questions if they came up but I didn’t make a big deal of it
Q:What are your favorite parts of the being in or just the LGBTQ+ community?
The Black Queer community always makes me feel welcome! I feel included somewhere, as if i fit in for once.
Q:As a POC in this community, do you see yourself as represented? Whether in the media, in the community, etc.
Absolutely not. That or it’s pandering. When I see LGBTQIA people they’re usually White OR they make the LGBTQIA person Black with a White Spouse and mixed children. It’s very cookie cutter and virtue signal of them to do that
Q:What is some advice to someone who is not out, still in the closet, questioning their sexuality, etc.
You don’t have to come out until you’re ready. Being out doesn’t make you any different or lesser. Please be safe & know that if you need us to back you up we are here.
Q:What does pride month or the general topic of pride mean to you?
I wish Pride Month was about the entire LQBTQIA spectrum but it often focuses on rainbow capitalism / gay people. Many sexualities are still very underrepresented.
THANK YOU FOR READING!!
A big thanks to all these wonderful people for agreeing to be apart of this. For the rest of Pride I have two more interviews left in this month. Remember, new posts come out every Tuesday. Don’t forget to follow me on all my socials to be updated when I post. If you have any topics you want me to write about, shoot me a message on Instagram! Until next time 🙂
