Self-Confidence: My Progress & How I Built It To Now

These past few weeks I have really just surprised myself. In more ways than one. But what surprised me ,that I finally noticed, is my self-confidence. Over the past, not three years, I have been trying to better my confidence. Not just in my style ,but in myself in general. In the way that I carry myself, how I value myself, and even how I perceive myself. My confidence was at such a low in 2018/2019. It has been for years that my self-confidence was at low. But recently that changed a bit. I started to see myself differently. As well as partake in events and social settings that 3 years ago me could never imagine me doing.

It took me this long to get to the level that I am at. Even if it is the smallest step. To me, it felt like I moved a mountain just to get here. I wanted to share my own self-confidence discoveries. Little things that I pushed myself to do in order to better myself. If this resonates with you. I hope that it bring you some motivation to keep defying the old you. Because eventually, you’ll start shedding away that dead skin. Revealing such a new ,healthier you.

I tried taking unfiltered pictures of myself to boost my self- confidence

We all know the filters that you can use on Snapchat. When I tell you that I would use those filters 24/7. All because they either cleared my skin or made my face look smaller. My own self-confidence wasn’t well enough to even handle me liking an unfiltered pciture of myself. I never liked taking selfies without a filter on. Why? Maybe because I didn’t like the acne and pimples on my face. The blemishes I tried so hard to get rid of were there.

Over time, whenever I felt pretty or beautiful, I’d take selfies. And slowly ,but surely. I tried to take more pics of myself without a filter. I noticed progress last week when I took some pictures of myself. And guess what! I didn’t hate them! As a matter of fact, I felt more confident in the unfiltered pictures than the filtered ones. The small steps of progress.

My self-confidence was tied to my past

Ya know how they say that you can’t dwell on the past? Well, dwelling on the past is my middle name 🙂

A lot of people had opinions on my own appearance and on who I was as a person. So much opinions that it impacted me to my core. It kind of stuck with me. So, when I started to research how to better my self-confidence. I saw that most sites said to work on healing. With that, I had to move on from the past. Realizing that the past can’t hinder my future. Nor can it hinder how I see my self in the present. I think at times, we let the past hinder our growth. To the point that we start holding grudges.

And personally, I believe that holing grudges is just allowing negative energy to have a hold on you. Once I slowly started trying to heal my past. I saw that my perception of myself became a bit more clearer. Of course, I have some ways to go. But the progress so far is promising.

The more I accepted my body, the less hate I felt

Body image is something that I’ve talked about multiple times on this blog. It’s something that I personally deal with every single day. Coming from someone who had really bad body image issues in high school. Overcoming my body hate is a hard road I’m traveling on. It has really tested my confidence. As well as how I see my confidence in myself. Over time, I stopped trying to force myself to love my body, but just accept it. To just acknowledge that it looks like this for now & that’s okay.

So far, I can look in the mirror 7/10 times and not get upset at what I see. Compared to the 2/10 that I had two years ago. I say that my self-confidence in my body has gotten better. Accepting what you are is easier to do than to immediately love yourself. Once you have that down, it seems like everything else comes easier.

I pushed myself out my comfort zone

The one thing that I never do is go out my comfort zone when it comes to certain situations. It’s a fault of mine that I’m trying to get better at. When I started college this semester, I told myself to try and branch out. I didn’t want to be the loner again. A girl with no friends because “the one’s I have is all I need”. As much as that was true, my friends don’t live in town.

This forced me to muster up some self-confidence to get out there. And when I tell you I am surprising myself still. So far, I’ve joined three organizations and have met various people. I might even join another organization. At first, I was very hesitant. Trying to meet new people & network took a lot of energy out of me. But at the end of the day, it really put a positive impact on my confidence.

THANK YOU FOR READING !

I usually don’t make these types of personal posts. I can’t say what prompted me to make one ,but I’m glad I did. Usually, we don’t realize how common some of our insecurities can be until we say them out loud. With self-confidence, I know I’m not at my peak yet. I do have some ways to go. For instance, I still only take pictures by myself and at my home. Mostly because I’m too embarrassed or anxious to do it in public. Even people taking pictures of me makes me shrivel up in to a ball. My self-confidence is like a windy road. With unexpected turns everywhere. Eventually I get to a safe spot ,but then I’m challenged again in new ways. But that excites me a bit. It just shows that the only way I can go is up. Which is something that helps me keep going.

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