Do you want to know what the biggest thing I’ve learned when it comes to body confidence? It is that toxic positivity doesn’t work for everyone. For so long I was always like “love yourself” “love your body no matter what”. “No matter what, always have a positive outlook,” well that didn’t really work for me. I got introduced to body neutrality a short while after. And realized that what I was implementing was Toxic Positivity. And it hurt me more than it even helped me. After that, I stopped preaching body positivity. And more so let people know that it isn’t for everyone. So, here are 5 reasons why positivity, more so Toxic positivity isn’t for everyone.
Toxic positivity really knows how to make you deny your own true emotions. There is nothing wrong with trying to see the good side of things. But at the same time, you are human. You have these emotions and it’s okay to feel the way you do. Not everyone is able to be so optimistic. Not everyone can be happy go lucky all the time. A situation has you feeling a negative way. That is a valid and real human emotion. It is a real and valid human action to have. So, don’t deny yourself the feeling because you want to move past it so quick.
Instead, let yourself sit in that negative emotion. Journal out how it is making you feel. Ask yourself questions as to why you may be feeling this way.
2. Can't learn from your flaws/mistakes
This is something that I stand strongly by. You should always take away something from a mistake. Whether positive or negative, find something to learn. And as my dad likes to say, “keep it in your left hand”. When we use toxic positivity, it has us blocking out the situation entirely. As if we aren’t or shouldn’t look back on it for a reference. This has us not able to learn from our flaws or mistakes. It doesn’t let us acknowledge them either. We all have flaws that we can improve upon. No one can become perfect ,but you can improve and become more understanding. Because fun fact, there is a big difference between toxic positivity & helpful positivity. See the picture below for examples.
Often times when we are feeling a certain way, the instinct is to brush it off. Hide it under the rug. Shelf it for another time when we can deal with it. But when do you take it off the shelf and deconstruct it? With toxic positivity the answer is never. You gaslight yourself in a way in to thinking that you don’t need to. That “everything is going to be okay.” “I’m fine with how everything is.” But are you really? Sit with those emotions. Let yourself feel sad, frustrated, heartbroken, even grief. The only way to fully heal from these negative emotions is to understand why they’re there. Ask yourself the hard questions. And go through the necessary healing process.
When we gaslight, minimize, and/or invalidate ourselves we also halt our growth. As people, you grow from learning. And you learn by going through certain experiences. When you deny yourself from experiencing those needed emptions, you’re halting your growth. Who you are meant to become. The person that is stronger at the end of the tunnel. An aspect of toxic positivity is to dismiss yours or other people’s emotions. And that causes more guilt later on. Imagine that guilt can be missed by just letting yourself feel what you need to feel. It’d make a lot of things easier in the long run.
5. It limits the belief you have in yourself
We are all trying to become a better person. And trying to incorporate better habits. There are people in your life that believe in you. But what about yourself? Toxic positivity will have you feeling some low self-esteem at some point. Feeling as if you’re not making any progress. Like you’re failing. But you’re not. You just need to rewire your mindset. Start to have belief in yourself again. It’s easier said than done. But isn’t everything in this world?
THANK YOU FOR READING !
It’s okay to be positive. And want to have a good mindset. But don’t minimize or devalue your own emotions in the process. I hope this week’s post resonated with you. Liking my self-love content on my blog? Want it in video form? Go follow my Tik Tok! Click the Tik Tok icon below. See you next week!
Don’t forget to share and check out my other posts. If you wanna talk more about this week’s post or any other post, shoot me a DM on Instagram! Follow me on all my socials to know when I post a new blog. Also, follow my Facebook page! If you didn’t know I have a shop! Head over there and check out the essential oils, perfumes, and other goodies. Don’t forget to share and leave a comment down below! Welp, until next time!
Follow me on Instagram TikTok Twitter Facebook for more content!
Check out my recent posts!
Healing: 5 Powerful Ways How I Heal As A Black Woman
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, AND HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH! Welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning
Journaling for Growth: Unlock Your Creativity and Clarity
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, and welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday new blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning one, I am
Rejection is Redirection: 5 Helpful Ways to Handle Rejection
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn Hello T.A & Co. readers, and welcome to this week’s T.A & Co. Tuesday new blog post. Whether you are a new reader or a returning one, I am